My Worst Enemy
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8 (NIV)
There have been moments when I truly hated my life and I used to scream at the top of my lungs, “I wish I was dead! God, just let me die!” Obviously, it never happened but those were my overwhelming thoughts. I never thought of taking action on them but because of situations and self-loathing, I was miserable. After one of my rages, I would always settle and pray. “Why can’t my life be like others? Lord, fix me.” I knew the enemy had a serious hold on me during those years. Isabella Campolattaro (Mornings with Jesus) shares a similar story.
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The voice is harsh, critical, and condemning. It picks at every problem, magnifies my mishaps, ridicules each wrinkle. It is persistent, sometimes whispers, but often nags with urgency. Merciless and mischievous, it tends to blindside me when I’m feeling really good about myself or about something I’ve done.
Who’s accusatory voice is it? My own, encouraged by the enemy, who wants me to believe the worst about myself. Thank goodness I have a friend, Jesus, who also talks to me.
Unlike the enemy, my Advocate and Savior Jesus speaks softly, gently, kindly. Even in redirecting me, He speaks simply, without shaming. He does not condemn me but instead speaks the truth that I am chosen (1 Peter 2:9), loved (John 3:16), and made in His image (Genesis 1:27). When I go astray, which is often, Jesus waits patiently for me to feel the weight of my waywardness and return to Him. He sometimes looks me in the eye with compassion and concern and reminds me of His wise and loving ways. His peaceful presence is always available.
Whenever I hear that other inner voice, I acknowledge it and remind it that Jesus is bigger, stronger, and full of love. His voice is the only one I want to hear.
FAITH STEP: Whose voice are you listening to? List what your destructive voice says, then speak out loud to each comment: “Jesus is bigger, stronger, and full of love. I don’t have to listen to you anymore!”